Tumor Tongue

"I don't want your Tumor Tongue"

From trivia night table chat: tainted triumph

http://blog.oregonlive.com/commuting/2009/12/back_to_the_days_when_society.html

aaaaaahahahhahahhahahah bicycle face!

Generic Balls of Hair

Leah XXXXXX [9:51 AM]:
All teenagers look like generic balls of hair to me these days anyway

we were told by some grumpy employee in the grocery that heelies were NOT ALLOWED

i thanked her for the information and moved on, taking no action whatsoever

i figured that was the right response

was JB using them in the store?

yeah

but not like sprinting or anything

she was just lazily circling the bagels

perhaps she looked like an imminent bagel threat

My smart-assery is stymied...

imminent bagel threat is my new band name

09:03 <@cj_> deimos: all they actually said was that, yeah, 5% or so of their
clergy are pedophiles, but according to some studies, there are
EVEN MORE pedophiles in protestant churches, so WHY YOU PICKING ON
US
09:04 <@cj_> deimos: a huge endorsement for christianity there
09:04 <@isosceles> pedo priests on the lam
09:04 <@isosceles> is that something one can name their band
09:04 <@cj_> yes

thank you, my crazy ex girlfriend with crazy disjointed notes

19:11 <@isosceles> no offense
19:11 <@isosceles> i love team hugbomb and all
19:12 <@isosceles> but "the crazypedians" is a better name
19:12 <@isosceles> and also a great name
19:12 <@isosceles> ... FOR MY BAND
19:13 <@isosceles> also
19:13 <@isosceles> THE VOYNICH MANUSCRIPT OF CRAZY

"A roller derby player once referred to getting a wheel to the crotch as a 'giner shiner."

Karate Birthday Party

<@Encapsulate> Karate Birthday Party
<@Encapsulate> Fun, Safe, and Reasonably Priced Let us make your child the star!
<@Encapsulate> www.pmakarate.com
<@killfile> so BT cut off my phone line
<@Encapsulate> Band Name: Karate Birthday Party
<@Encapsulate> (It's a sponsored link on the side of my gmail)
<@toast> Encapsulate: BLOG IT

BT Cut Off My Phone Line: The new album by Karate Birthday Party drops Tuesday.

from a Wikibook on comparative linguistics

False Friends of the Slavist

The Northwest Passengers

But early next week the German-owned vessels, Beluga Fraternity and Beluga Foresight, are scheduled to dock in the Dutch port of Rotterdam. It is the culmination of a two-month voyage from South Korea across the perilous waters of the Arctic, where an unprecedented ice-melt has at last made the previously impassable course a viable possibility.

from a scrabble game

K hoarder

tam: HAVE YOU EVER HAD SHAKIRA
tam: I THINK IT WAS INVENTED BY FRAT BOYS FOR SORORITY GIRLS
tam: UH
tam: SANGRIA
tam: DONT MIND ME
tam: SMALL AND HUMBLE
db: slow your roll
tam: gear down, big rig

10:35 <toast> w/ mac they have incrementals, but if you're too far out of date it downloads a megapatch that does it all at once

10:36 <toast> so you never have more than one update, even on an ancient machine

10:36 <Dave> sounds like the name of a nerd-core rock band

10:36 <Dave> MEGAPATCH

there goes my cherry

06:50 <@madcow> >> tweet from illogicnet: indian (ayurveda?): aggressive
nudity. so much oil. made forehead tingle. stuck finger in
belly button repeatedly. significant butt massage. <<
09:16 <@fuckindia> new band name: significant butt massage
09:17 <@toast> BLOG IT

Spurious And

11:05 <@toast> Sarah Palin is considering getting her own radio show. OWW! That
hurts my ears just thinking about it!!
11:07 <@mirth> she'd probably do okay
11:07 <@mirth> on radio people won't be able to tell she's totally scripted
most of the time
11:08 <@mirth> before politics she did read dummy cards for a living
11:08 <@toast> yeah she was a news anchor heh
11:08 <@toast> I think she'd handle it OK
11:09 <@mirth> well, looks like health care reform's dead again
11:09 <@mirth> why did i bother even hoping for this
11:11 <@twid> look at all the credbility dr. laura and sacrificed over the
years and she's still on radio
11:11 <@twid> er, spurious and
11:11 <@twid> Spurious And is my new band name

Shammy Butter

16:08 <@toast> Encapsulate: http://coachlevi.com/cycling/chamois-butter-exposed/

16:10 <@twid> Shammy Butter is my new band name

11:39 <toast> "My single favorite moment of the TBA last year was Mike Daisey's unrehearsed performance at the Works, wherein the sweaty monologist launched an absolutely scathing attack on the passivity of contemporary art audiences. "If you don't like something, leave," he said at one point. "Do something! Put your dick on the table, make a little cut, and see what comes out. It might be blood. It might be ghosts!" "

11:39 <toast> blop: wanna find out?

11:40 <blop> toast: what are we talking about?

11:41 <toast> blop: dick ghosts

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

megahal gibberish

10:01 <madcow> Bombs in the ocean. Somewhere around dawn we had breakfast in a disguise made of redwood sawdust, ground glass and barley. Soup was made from a long fine flash, for reasons that nobody really understands at the pacific school of religion in my soup.

madcow is an IRC bot with the magical ability to generate gibberish.. Sometimes it comes up with good band names..

10:03 <j0no> madcow mh What's your band name?

10:03 <madcow> My meatus is pleased. Thank you for pleasing the meatus. The meatus will now retire for the divine in all insane asylums after computer god orders even birdie now has changed her name for historical purposes. Teddy roosevelt was paid off with the endless "stairway to the backside of life, a filthy piss-ridden little hole nailed off by the ****** women ran into my cab ahead of me i slammed the door on them and told the cabbie "i ordered this cab and i was in your ass.

band name inspired by last night's scrabble game:

auk tongue

2:28 <isosceles> thats a great word

12:28 <isosceles> groin

12:35 <tamara> moist groin

12:35 <tamara> NEW BAND NAME

Dietary Discussion

16:13 <jej> when i go camping and dig a hole and poop in it... vegan/freegan?
16:13 <Encapsulate> Vegan YES
16:13 <Encapsulate> Freegan: POSSIBLY
16:13 <Encapsulate> After you bury it, does someone come along and eat it?
16:14 <jej> Encapsulate: I HOPE SO
16:14 <toast> CAMPSITE TURDBURGLER

Math Functions

While discussing his math homework, my son uttered the phrase, "I forgot about the Difference of Squares".

Thanks iTAP

"Puppyact Folks"

This is what my phone has decided Pussycat Dolls should actually be named.

This would work best if it were a dude cover version of the Pussycat Dolls. All of the music would be done in the style of Bluegrass.

Ladyparts Expert

more for today

PS apologies to cappy for missing his band from yesterday

Witch Factory

Naked to Space

Errata

Please note, Toast is a big doody and completely ignored adding "Trucker Bedroom" into his list from today.

Random band names from today

She-Toast
Glowbutt

17:09 <toast> according to specialized, it has: "numbness-killing chassis, predictable geometry and robust wheelset"
17:09 <toast> nothing sucks more than unpredictable geometry (good band name)
17:09 <Encapsulate> Predictable geometry...
17:09 <Encapsulate> "That frame is certainly always bicycle shaped."
17:09 <tamara> http://www.health-information-fitness.com/enemarecipes.html
17:10 <tamara> THERE IS A RECIPE FOR A *MAYO ENEMA* ON THERE
17:10 <Encapsulate> Two great band names within 4 minutes
17:10 <Encapsulate> Unpredictable Geometry and the opener Mayo Enema

<toast> tamara: BREAKING NEWS
<toast> tamara: WASHINGTON HALTS DISPUTED GEODUCK HARVEST
<hlprmnky> oh no, your ocean-mudcock adventure hopes are dashed!
<toast> that's a pretty good band name
<tamara> toast WHAT THE FUCK
<tamara> NOT COOL
<tamara> let's do it anyway
<hlprmnky> another good band name: ILLEGAL GEODUCK HARVEST
<toast> hehe
<toast> that's more of an ALBUM NAME IMO

23:03 <t12> Moderate intoxication includes additional abnormalities such as hyperactive bowel sounds,
23:03 <t12> woah woah woah
23:03 <t12> hyperactive bowel sounds
23:04 <toast> :o
23:04 <toast> that is so the name of my band

Tonight, Opening for the Piss Tests: Huffy At Best

<@toast> I have never had to take a piss test
<@toast> I think I would be HUFFY AT BEST

via recollection of a real event:

egg scented explosion